Relationship Destroyers – Part Four



About Intimate and/or Sexual Relationships – Part 4

The Main Attractions – Is it Chemistry?
Or Can Chemistry be an Umbrella Term?  Are Our ‘5 Senses’ & Imagination necessary for a Successful, Sexual Relationship?  Are We challenged by Sexual Chemistry?
Do we rely on these famous 5 plus our imagination to tell us if we are sexually suited for one another?  Do we, or should we have a daily diet or at least, a continuous diet of the ‘famous five plus’ to keep a relationship sexually alive?  You better believe you should.  My musing continues here.

For most people, I believe we would all agree, that initially, the main attraction from one person for another is a sexual attraction or sexual chemistry.  With some couples sexual chemistry maybe become intense, but with others, it may be mild in nature.  However, the important factor is that you have a compatible libido with your partner so that both individuals feel satisfied instead of neglected or pressured into intimacy they don’t desire.

Chemistry as an Umbrella Term
For the sake of argument, let’s use ‘chemistry’ as an umbrella term because there are other things that can keep chemistry alive and functioning, but unfortunately, many people tend to forget what may have caused the chemistry in the first place, so I will elaborate, as I see it. Like I said before, everything is debatable, because everything is “in the eyes of the beholder”, and we all differ in our likes and dislikes.

Each term or terms #1 – #5 (below) can handle a chapter of their own, but are listed here to make a point. These are the factors that I feel deal with chemistry.

1- Sight = Provocative or Debonair dress – is a sexual attraction. Sometimes it’s the first thing you see about another person. It can have the power to make it or break it. Erotic, revealing wear and/or chic, elegant or trendy fashions might turn you on. Everyone has their own opinion of what kind of wear is sexy to them – what catches their eye and turns them on.

2- Sight and Hearing = Flirting – can be for the purpose of suggesting you are sexually interested in someone, or it can be done in a playful, entertaining mode. Flirting can be sexually provocative or fun-loving. Body language, facial expressions, and sex talk play in here.

3- Hearing = Sex Talk – many people use sexual innuendos to imply/suggest they are romantically or sexually interested. (not exactly dirty talk, yet – we’ll get to that later). Sex talk is used to heighten sexual desire and/or arousal. Sex talk is good before or during physical sexual activity, though some people are either uncomfortable with it or not good at it.

4- Smell, Taste, and Touch – I like to think of these three as the “tantalizing trio. This is a chapter in and of itself.

5- Fantasy = Imagination – we have the ability to use our imagination for sexual enhancement/stimulation.

Taking #1 – #5 plus Imagination into consideration, most all of which are typically important in the commencement and development of a sexual relationship.  Do you find any of these 5+ more important than the others?  Okay, I’m certain you favor some more than others, because some affect you more than others.  Understood.  As a sexual relationship progresses, do these 5+ things stay in the limelight of importance?  Or do some or all of these famous five+ start falling by the wayside as the relationship matures?

Without getting into deep detail, the bottom line is this: as a relationship matures, people tend to pay less attention to the main attractions which were essential and/critical to initially launch their sexual relationship.  They become more comfortable and less attentive, without realizing that all things still matter and attention is needed to maintain a successful, healthy, sexual relationship….
(continued in Part 5)    

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