About Intimate and/or Sexual Relationships – Part 5 –
I may have a strange and unique way of expressing my views about relationships, but the reason is simply this… it’s my opinion. Unless your passion is to be someone’s submissive or sex slave or you are a devout masochist, relationship cages a turn-off, suffocating, threatening, and damned nerve-racking. Cages are relationship destroyers for many individuals. If you are a cage creator and cage keeper, you may be a relationship destroyer, depending on the personality of your other half.
If you are thinking, what cages? I’m going to take a peek inside these cages and right into the heart of the matter, so if you are the cage keeper and you have keys to the locks on any of these cages – find your keys. If you are locked in Cage #1…. ah, … GET OUT! Cages #2 & #3 speak for themselves. Relationship Cages = Relationship Destroyers:
Cages Can Cause to Weak Your Links or Destroy Relationships
Cage #1 – JEALOUSY:
Do you often find yourself in emotional turmoil? Do your emotions suffer in silence? Do you find yourself walking on eggshells in fear of upsetting your partner or spouse? Do you try to avoid doing things that will cause his or her jealousy to flare? Okay then, there you go…. you’re locked up in a cage labeled jealousy; the boundaries you adhere to, to spare an argument (or not); the rules, regulations, restrictions and expectations that are posted on you because of someone’s jealousy, can be emotionally unhealthy. It can cause deep-seeded resentment and can destroy your feelings for that person in time. Some people may add possessiveness to this cage. In short, the restrictions a partner/spouse espouses and enforces on you is a relationship destroyer. The Cage of/from Jealousy!
Cage #2 – INSECURITY:
Yes, this is a big one, too. This cage is often self-inflicted. Are you in a relationship cage for reasons related to security or insecurity? Do you feel your insecurities are responsible for putting you in a cage – you do this willingly or unconsciously for protection and/or survival? Have you wanted to bust out of your cage and run away but your need for security/your innate insecurities keep you locked up where you are right now – in the relationship where you are right now, where you intend to stay? For some people, Cage #2 can embrace loneliness and the need of companionship. The Cage of Insecurity!
Cage #3 – FANTASIES:
Do you harbor your deepest fantasies? Do you feel you have to suppress your fantasies rather than share them with your partner or spouse because you’re afraid of the reaction you will receive? I can tell you from experience that your fantasies are safe and secure left alone and lurking privately in your own imagination. It is true that most people cannot handle hearing about another person’s deepest, darkest fantasies. They can be interpreted as demented, repulsive, bizarre, macabre, threatening, insulting, critical and/or adulterous. Some partners are told that masturbation is cheating! How fucked-up is that? Communication and sharing is great until it comes to ‘fantasies’, then you may experience what I’m talking about. So, unless your partner/spouse is known to be extremely open-minded and non-judgmental, think seriously before divulging your dark, secret fantasies. Keep them safe and sound locked up in your fantasy mind – ‘the cage’ that keeps your deepest fantasies under lock and key. Of course, we know that most fantasies are better left alone in our fantasy mind anyway. Many fantasies can back fire in reality! Use caution here.
(later continued to Part 6)